Try to have super noisy days at work and not having a meltdown in lonely weekend.. could you?
when wanting something which the only effort can be done is praying to God..
and in the end, the only evaluation can be done because not having it is by asking why to God..
and a meltdown again..
In fact, God answers ALL prayer, but sometimes the answer is “no”, sometimes it is “not yet”, and other times the answer is “yes”..
Luckily (in a depressed mode), the answer is still ‘no’ or ‘not yet’? well, I don’t know.. Maybe I still have to learn a lot of things..
Sometimes I just want to quit this.. But I’m not a quiter.. I hate a quiter.. So, I don’t want to become one.. So, let’s do the best til the end.. though I don’t know whether it will be a happy or sad ending..
Why in this matter I couldn’t think clearly.. sometimes I don’t even know which way is right.. which way I should take? why I couldn’t be great in this one matter? why I can be great in anything else except this?
It’s never been easy each ways.. So, just choose any way that’ll bring you less pain or less time with pain..
There’s a moment when I think that all of it is just nothing.. but why I always feel something..
and these all are part of my shattered mind.. one line isn’t lead to another.. it won’t explain anything.. I can’t explain anything based on these lines.. If I could, I would be in better shape right now..